Finding Love in the Digital Age

Posted: January 14, 2013 in Uncategorized
Tags: , , , , ,

I’m working on a series of posts about this Online Dating Phenomenon. It’s kind of an upgraded version of the ads people used to put in newspapers (well, still do.) and the less sluttier sister of Craigslist. To whet your palate, here’s my profile. Enjoy and share, my cyber-friends!

About me:

-I always secretly want the soup, but the endlessness of the salad always gets me at Olive Garden.
-I hate black licorice with the passionate heat of a thousand suns.
-Monty Python and Mitch Hedberg make me laugh.
-Rice is overrated.
-Fox News makes me sad.
-Chicago is awesome but so very, very cold.
-I like to run—in theory.
-Sarcasm is lovely.
-Meat. I know, lots of you are vegetarians, and I respect that (I read part of Eating Animals, too), but, you know… steak.
-Do not own a picture of me without my shirt on—out of pure principle
-Am not training for MMA
-Do not want to four-wheeler ride or hunt large animals with you
-Whoa, went negative there for a minute
-But that’s okay, I mean, I can have an opinion about MMA and elk hunting, can’t I?
-And, seriously, put on a shirt…
-I make amazing chicken picatta
-Fall is the best season
-I’m convinced sociopaths bring raisin cookies to events to see that disgusted look on the faces of those who thought they were chocolate chip
-Black spider-man is my hero
-Hey, world. Twilight? Really?
-Travel is a good thing
-Inappropriate humor
-I’m kind of impressed you’re still reading.
-Reading and writing things down (fictional things. …not… that this list is fictional.)
-You’re gone, aren’t you?
-It’s probably for the best.
-It was the twilight comment, wasn’t it?

So, wow, if you hung around through that, you deserve a nice meal and maybe a door or two opened up for you. If you laughed, I’ll probably make you laugh. (I’m not bad at that.) If you think it was weird and don’t like chicken picatta, it probably wasn’t meant for you. (No offense. And I secretly don’t care if you don’t like chicken picatta.) We’re all looking for someone, not sometwo or three (well… some of us are) and if you think we might get along, by all means, do that idiotic wink thing or just email me and say hi (it’s 2013, after all.)


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